The other night on Facebook, I posted things I thought were the worst. I said Evite (it was frustrating me), self-check out at the grocery store (it just irritates me), and then homework (my kids', not mine). The worst is really a parent or child dying (I've lost my mom and others close to me).
I also really do not like clowns. Seriously, very afraid. However, I do not share that tidbit about me with many people. In fact, at this point, just my sisters and college roommates know that fear. (The college roommates pasted clowns everywhere in my dorm room, my sisters just laugh and say you better run, there's a clown).
My question today is how much to share with the people you kind of know? But primarily, how much to share about your child with people your child knows but you don't. Ideally, your child will be friends with them at some point? I don't always tell other people Builder is ADHD or on the spectrum. Of course, my close friends all know.
Yet, my life would be so much easier if everyone knew how Builder thinks. It isn't wrong, it is just different than many others. He knows he has Asperger's. I'm not sure how much he understands it; but he knows it makes him special and unique. He has talents and skills the majority of his friends and family do not. He also has limitations, mostly social. However, it is impossible to let the world know.
So, as much as I would love to print postcards with helpful hints, I don't. Certainly, considered it. I feel we need to help Builder understand how the other side thinks. It doesn't seem right to say he has Autism. It sounds like a disease. I prefer to say he thinks differently. His brain works in a distinct way.
Much like mine. I just can't get past the face paint, red nose, and really big shoes. I just hope I never have a clown behind me in the self-checkout line at the grocery store.
I rarely use the word autism because I feel that its meaning is tainted by society. I don't often use aspergers either, preferring "aspie" which is (for me at least a cute-ism for Aspergers). Some people I know hate the word "aspie" too.
ReplyDeleteI don't immediately make people aware that my son has aspergers but I do make it known as I begin to notice issues with his behaviour in their presence.
It's important that people who look after your child and people who are friends with your child don't mistake bizarre behaviour for aggression.
Sometimes my son will have trouble knowing when a joke has gone too far. If people know that there are other issues, they're more likely to resolve the issue in a peaceful manner.
Besides; I don't think that there's anything wrong with being an aspie. He should be proud of his individualism.
Thanks for your insight. I totally agree. I thought more about it and it is all how we handle it. The how is more important than the why. I am not a fan anymore of the labels because my son isn't, and that shows me the way.
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