It is hard not to be upset by an Asperger's child's behavior. Why? Lots of reasons.

1. It appears selfish.
2. It seems manipulative.
3. It is usually extreme.
4. It appears disrespectful.
5. It feels horrible.

But the catch is, it isn't their fault. It is their wiring. It is their body's way of dealing with a world seen differently. I need to remember this fact, always. I need to never forget it even when their behavior that isn't so nice to people has me upset.
My child does not have crutches, a G-tube, or braces. He looks and acts like a normal 'tween. Totally. No offense, (as he would say in his Tween-speak), but he isn't. It isn't fair to treat him like a regular student, when he can't do the work load. It isn't OK to expect him to act as if he cares about others, when he just doesn't. It isn't OK to expect him to do anything, except what he wants to do.
He will do those other items to for others sometimes; but only if he thinks he gets something for it he wants. As for school, there is really no reason to do any of it in his mind, but he understands as part of the rules of school, you just do it.
From the mundane to the really important, it is I who must internalize how my son thinks.